5-25-2007
Yesterday I got lost and I had natto for lunch on the same day. Despite that it was a pretty good day. I went to my nursery school the night before my first visit. I wanted to make sure that I knew where it was. I found it quickly and was excited that it was so accessible. The next morning I left 30 minutes early. I arrived and noticed there were no students. I peeked in the door and a teacher came. I asked her if I was supposed to be here. It was very clear that I was not. I showed her my map and she told me the place I wanted was just down the street. No harm done I was still 20 minutes early. I walked in the door and children started shouting “Gaijin, gaijin”. Basically it means “Foreigner, foreigner.” I hoped I was in the right place. The strange looks I received did nothing to bolster my confidence. I went to the “office” and quietly announced that I was here (and early to boot). Stares. I looked at each face and no one even registered a hint of recognition. Yipes. I wound up in the wrong place again. Luckily a lady spoke English and told me that they did not need an AET. “How could that be?” I wondered to myself. “This is the place that my vice principal showed me on my map.” She reassured me that this was the place circled on the map but that again they did not need an AET (my title-Assistant English Teacher). She pointed to a different place and said it was a kindergarten. That was probably the place I needed to go. Ok, I would be a little late. They will understand (hopefully I can explain). I find the place quickly and again receive the blank look “cold shoulder” combo. Third time was not the charm. They pointed out a place on the map that was another nursery school. I was on my way. Ten minutes later I still had not found it. I noticed that my elementary school had called my cell phone (which meant that my nursery school had called them, I was in deep trouble.). I had a nervous feeling in my stomache (like the time I unintentionally hit Jana with a baseball bat when I was 7). I drove around a few more minutes. I was debating what to do. I could call my school and try to explain. Instead I decided to try a few more minutes. I saw a security guard and asked her where I should go. She asked a construction worker and he told her, left, then right, then it should be on the left side of the road (in Japanese). For a second I was excited I could understand (it was like finding a dollar on a sinking ship) then I remembered I was 45 minutes late (bad in America, even worse in Japan (ten minutes early=on time). I finally pulled up to the nursery school. It was the right one. They were happy to see me I'm sure (but they hid it very well). I think they were worried that they got a lemon. After apologizing profusely, they took me to the teachers room. I was the only one there. A lady that looked like she was in charge came in. We sat quietly. I tried to make small talk. I failed and she didn’t even make an attempt. Another teacher came in after about 15 minutes and said something that I didn’t understand, she left. Apparently I was supposed to follow her because she came back about 3 minutes later looking a bit peeved. I was feeling as if strike 3 had come and gone and I was quickly approaching 10. I walked into the room and 18 smiling 5 year olds came into view. We started the lesson and immediately I was comfortable again. I didn’t need to worry. I could't change anything that had happened and worrying wouldn't make me feel any better. The lesson went well. And when it was time to leave I felt much more relaxed around the lady who I perceived as being in charge. I left shortly after and went to my elementary school. When I arrived all of the important people (principal, vice principal, disciplinarian, curriculum director) were in the teachers room. They asked if everything was ok. I smiled and took them my map. I spent the next ten minutes explaining my journey (imagine lots of pointing and looking confused). The curriculum director left and quickly came back, took my map and said “no”. He pointed to off the map. He turned it over and drew an extension of the road. He jabbed his pen into the back of the map and chuckled. This was where my nursery school was. I apologized and left with the feeling that I was a disappointment but I didn’t care too much at that point. I headed upstairs to eat lunch with my fifth graders. Natto was on the menu (with mustard and soy sauce). Natto (fermented soybeans) is not something that I would choose to eat. However, I was on the spot with 30 some 5th graders watching each bite. I smiled as if it was the best thing I had ever eaten. I ate every bit just like mama taught me. I showed them the bottom of my container.
God really humbled me today. I was feeling self reliant and he showed me just how much I know and how big I am. A slice of humble pie and some rotten soybeans for dessert. Who says God doesn’t have a sense of humor? I am glad that He gave me one too.
I was sitting alone in the English room between classes the other day trying to think of ways to represent Christ to a people that I can’t communicate with effectively. I was brainstorming and I was drawing blanks. I was thinking about Jesus’ ministry and I had the thought, Jesus could speak to the people he was serving. He spoke Hebrew. He was able to speak to them, encourage them, counsel them, and teach them. The immediate follow up thought was, Ah, and you speak Hebrew very well. That is definitely how you found out about Jesus. I know Jesus because his actions have traversed across generations. I took that thought and applied it to my life. Each day should be approached with the attitude of a man who can’t even speak, yet is able to represent Christ despite of his limitations. I can definitely handle the not being able to speak part but I need some help with the other part. Please send me an email or leave a comment if you have any advice on practical ways that I could use to be Christ without speaking.
PS Please forgive any misspelled words or grammatical errors. Since I left America my English has deteriorated. I typed "nevered", "badded" and "spoked", and those are just the ones I caught.
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